All Abowt Boyz!!HeHe


15 WaYz GuYz FaiL In BeD(Rulez!)
Breakup Linez!!
10 things...
funni pik up linez!
Heart Broken Msn Namez!
The Male Brain!
Battle Of Da Sexes..Men Vs Woman!
Factz Abowt men!
Breakup Linez!!
Contact Me

Top 10 Places to have sex:

1. In your bed

2. In your parents bed

3. In his car

4. On a washing machine, while running

5. In a hot tub

6. On a beach, down in the sand

7. On a comfy couch with the TV on

8. On a waterbed

9. A plane bathroom

10.In the rain**

Top 10 Places NOT to have sex

1. In the movies

2. In a car... WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING!

3. In front of all of your friends

4. In a phonebooth

5. In your best friend's bed

6. At Grandma's house

7. At school

8. In your dirty basement

9. In the street


Top three things to say before having sex:

1. I love you (but only if you mean it)

2. Rock my world

3. Let's get ready to RUMBLE...

Top three things NOT to say before having sex:

1. Is this gunna hurt?

2. Sure....I've done this thousands of times...

3. Are you sure it's on there?

Top 3 things to say after sex:

1. Are you sure this was you're first time?

2. Gotta cigarette?

3. Wanna do it again?

Top 3 things NOT to say after sex:

1. That was IT??

2. I think I hear my mom calling me ---- see ya

3. OOPS, the condom broke! My bad!


Sex Jokes
What dosent belong in this list: Meat, eggs, Wife or blowjob?
Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs, wife, but you can't beat a blowjob.
Why does a penis have a whole in the end? 
 So men can be open minded
 Whats the speed limit of sex?
68 because at 69 you can turn around
What does a rubix cube and a penis have in common?
The longer you play with them the harder they get
What's the difference between your pay check and your cock?
You don't have to beg your wife to blow your pay check!
three words to ruin a mans ego
"is it in?"
How does a man know that they have a high sperm count?
If a girl has to chew, before she swallows
What do you get when you cross raggedy Ann and the pillsbury Dough boy?
A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.
How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?
one of his fingers is clean
Whats the biggest fish in the world?
A whore, if you catch one you can eat her for months
Whats the difference between parsley and pussy?
Nobody eats parsley
What green, slimy and smells like miss piggy?
Kermits finger
What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
Melt them down, make a tire, and call it goodyear
What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common?
They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber brakes your screwed
What happened when the mouse went up the ladies leg?
The pussy ate it



Oral sex- an ode to love
Penis breath, a lover's dread
Is what you get when you give head,
unpleasant as it tends to be
Be grateful that he doesn't pee
it's times like this, you wonder why
you bothered reaching for his fly
but it's too late, can't be a tease
Accpt the facts, get on your knees
you know you've got a job to do
So open wide and shove it through
Lick the tip and take it all
don't drag your teeth or he might bawl
Slide up and down, use your tongue
and feel the precum start to run
so when the fucks he's gonna come
just, when you can't take anymore
you hear your's lovers mighty roar
and when he hits that real high note
you feel it oozing down your throat
salty, fishy, sticky, yucky stuff
Okay, already that's enough
lets switch you say, before you gag
and whats your revenge, your on the rag.  
more sex poems 
Bash me, beat me, bite my bum,
Wrip me, strip me, 'til I come,
Fuck me suck me lick me out,
Pull my nipples 'til I shout
A hug turns into a kiss,
A kiss turns into a lick,
A lick turns into a suck,
A suck turns into a Fuck,
So come ova ere and give me a hug!!!!!!!! 
In a garden, Up a tree,
Make her wet make her pee,
suck her clit, suck her tit,
make her swallow never spit,
when your done, wipe her bum,
take her home & fuck her mum.

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